When you decide you are ready for parenthood, you go ahead and relinquish the right to sleep in and have lazy Sundays. You decide that you must be okay with bodily fluids (to some degree) and never being allowed to eat your meals in peace again. You also come to terms with the fact that when your baby is hurting, you will feel all of her pain too....or when someone hurts your little one, it stings you just as hard. However, you can always put a bandaid on a scrape or cut, and you can always soothe hurt feelings with a cuddle or a rock. What I am challenged with is something that makes me feel so completely helpless when it comes to Addie and her well being. It is more than likely the most challenging thing I have ever had to deal with in my life, and I hate it with more gusto and ferocity than the strongest hurricane you have ever faced. It happens to be the very simple fact that I am scared to feed her......FOOD ALLERGIES! If you can imagine feeling hesitant about a simple meal or snack each time you prepare your families meals or sit down to a nice dinner together, this is how I feel. I have never given this type of allergy much thought, and now it rocks my very core. I can remember watching Celebrity Apprentice and learning about Trayce Adkins (country singer who participated in the show) and his fight against serious food allergies because of his young daughters and their struggles with the disease. I had sympathy for him, but never fully understood the magnitude of what his family is dealing with until we had Addie and were faced with the same challenges.
Addie had a pretty serious allergic reaction to something (???) this past weekend that once again challenged me as a mother and made me question my plan of action when it comes to her health and all of her allergies. I pray that God helps me become strong and brave when it comes to this fight because I can honestly admit, I have never been more frightened in my life. We are so blessed to have such good health care providers so close to us, and luckily Addie is back to her old self again and rotten as ever! I will never again dismiss or downsize someone's battle with this disease and promise to keep them in my prayers as well!
2 comments:
I think God knew exactly what he was doing when he chose you for Addie's Mom. This weekend was very scary. You were very brave and did exactly what you knew you had to do. Addie is a lucky little girl!!!! I hate this disease that our little girl has, however, I am confident that you will be in control - not the allergies. Afterall, you are your mother's girl!!!!!!
Carrie you are amazing and Addie is such a cutie. Thinking about you.
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